Developing Realistic Expectations

What do your expectations looks like? I think I need to develop realistic expectations. I need to know how to strike the balance between hope and reality. I need hope to expect God's 'perfect' for me; while facing reality, and understanding and not becoming overly depressed if things don't work out how I thought they should. You know, leaning not to my own understanding (Proverbs 3: 5-6). I don't want to be negative but I want to be realistic. So if things don't work out as I thought or planned, I won't end up crashing to the floor in disappointment and despair.

Hubby and I had an unexpected trip outside of Japan the other day; and having realistic expectations is what I spoke to the Lord about while I got ready one morning before our trip. I had gotten angry, miserable and negative the night before when things didn't work out how I had been planning and laid out 'perfectly'. Sadly, that always happens to me. I therefore wanted my reflection after-the-fact to not be only a reflection after I've reacted badly, but it should be what I am thinking about at the onset of trouble. Like the Bible instructs us to resist the devil (James 4: 7), and this is done best at his onset.

I was very happy that I had had that talk with the Lord then because while on our trip, a very unexpected thing happened to us that could have derailed us (our spirits) significantly. I had to keep reminding myself (my hubby usually handles things much better than I do) about the note I had made in my diary. Each time I felt myself wanting to get upset, I could fight it off with that reminder.  I also believe that God put the following thought in my heart while we were struggling to deal with the situation at hand:

"Not because there is a fight, doesn't mean it won't work." 

I was definitely encouraged by that. The fighting part can surely put a damper on your hopes and what you're trying to do but the reality is that, that's how life goes! 

またね！(See you later!)

Loving is Easy When It Doesn't Cost a Thing

In my previous post I said how I want to be able to show love to others. I used the example of me watering some flowers at one of my schools and how they blossomed. I also want to water someone's life. 

Heh. People say that you're likely to be tested on something you've preached about. I surely was. And I failed miserably. :(

I was feeling quite downcast last week and it really peaked on Friday. I felt so angry and miserable. I was so down I didn't even write anything in my journal. But my reaction to how I was feeling was giving me another piece of something to share with you. 

When I am feeling down, I usually like to remind myself that I am not the only one going through something. But on Friday I was so caught up with how I was feeling that I didn't bother to show concern to someone who probably could have used some cheering up too. I was so absorbed in my own pain that I didn't bother to try to reach out to the individual. I only realized afterwards how I had the opportunity to give love but I didn't. Honestly, I didn't want to. 

When you're hurting it's easy to be thinking so much of yourself that you can't even see that there's someone right in your midst hurting as well. You might sense it, but can't seem to reach out or really don't care to. After all, you are hurting too. 

But you know, that's really how true love is shown - when you can do it no matter how hard it is for you. It's always easy when it doesn't cost you anything. 

Water Those Flowers

Since I figure that I'm on the road that I need to be on, and that I'm ok and on my way, and that I just need to keep moving, I really just want God to help me:

1. To take each day ONE DAY AT A TIME. 

2. To show love. 

I want to wake up, pray and know that although I might not feel well, the day will soon be over and God has given me new grace and mercies for the day. When I pray, I want to believe that power has been released and to be able to feel it. I want to understand that there is REAL power in the words of prayer. So when I say, "God please help me", I want it to be clear in my mind that God heard me and will help me. 

I want to be God's light everyday that I am out in those schools. I want to show love in the way that He has placed in my heart to that particular person who really needs it. I know they are there. I realize there are days I am tired and feel overwhelmed by the responsibilities I have but I still want to know that I made a difference to someone's life by my presence. It must be made clear to me that I had a positive impact on someone. I pray that God would make me see that I am making a difference and the way I made the difference. 

I've been watering some flowers at one of my schools since I started going there in April. I started watering them when one morning as I changed into my indoor shoes, I happened to see that they were drying up. I gave them some water and their appearance changed the next time I went to the school! The leaves were perky! I felt as though God told me that they were to become my responsibility. That is, I should water them whenever I went there. God often speaks to my heart through things like that. So although I couldn't see how watering flowers could be of any value to me, I obeyed. I have ensured that I water them while I'm there. In a way though, I'd often think that in the same way I'm watering them, I can also water someone's life. 

Yesterday the secretary called my attention to them. She was showing me how one of them was blooming. Later in the day she was also telling the man who does repairs/clean up at the school how the flowers I've been watering are blooming. He went and looked at them and told me, "Good job". 

They are just flowers. But because I'd been giving them water, they were now blooming. They went from drying up to blooming. And I had a hand in it.

My desire is to do the same in the life of someone.

How about you?